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 A boat by any other name…
By BOB E. SHERMAN
Waterfront News Columnist
Naming boats is an art form. I’ve been told that if you buy a boat that already has a name, it’s bad luck to change it. I have done this several times and so far I haven’t been sucked into the Bermuda Triangle.
I’ve also been told it is bad luck to go out into the ocean with a boat that has no name. Magellan sailed for the Philippines in 1519. All his boats had names and he still had bad luck. Possibly he brought the bad luck on himself when he tried to convert an Indian chief to Christianity. I wonder which part of “no” Ferdinand didn’t understand?
The ritual of naming boats goes back thousands of years. I couldn’t find any record of the actual name of Noah’s Ark. It appears that people used to call their boats by their own name, e.g. “John’s Boat” or “Paul’s Boat.”
It’s always fun to look at the names of boats when we’re cruising and wonder if there is a story behind each. Men with no imagination often name their boats after their wives, sometimes preceded by “Princess” or “Lady.”
My current boat is named Loose Change. It was called Sea Change when I bought it. So then why did I decide to change it, no pun intended? We were talking to some friends one night and discussing possible names. “Maybe I’ll call it Loose Change,” I blurted out. It stuck. It also turned out to be a good lead-in for a joke — it took a lot of “loose change” to buy the boat, or all I have left after buying it is “loose change.”
We have some envelopes onboard for people to leave tips or donations when they ride with us. The bank tellers use small envelopes with “Loose Change” printed in bold letters on them, so I picked up a dozen at the bank. So far I’ve yet to receive any donations.
You can tell a lot about people by the name they give their boats. On a recent trip to Miami I docked next to Mer Sea. The owner spoke French. My neighbor's boat is named Fa-Cha-Dit, which is Yiddish for mixed up, or messed up. Capt. Mel has owned the boat for 20 yeas and never throws anything out. Get the picture?
Several years ago my yacht club went on a west coast cruise. One of our new members hadn’t named his boat yet. At the captain’s meeting prior to the trip we explained that we would all monitor channel 69 on the VHF radio and we had to refer to him by name. We could not pressure him into coming up with a name on such short notice, so we decided to refer to his boat as “No Name.” By the time we had returned home we had all gotten used to it. He has now formally named his boat Noname, pronounced “no nami.”
Here’s some other names I considered:
Ahoy Vey, Hardly Davidson, Passing Wind, Irish Wake, Das Boat, Sue Me, Piso Mojado, Sea More, Monthly Payments, Dry Rot, Offline, Out of Line, Boat.com, Knot 4 Sail, Some Ketch, Ray Sea, Evan Rude, Man Law, Knot Sense, Free Dumb, Mi Sea Elo, No Hurry Cane and Enola Cay.
If you’re still stumped for a name, a trip to the grocery store should offer some ideas. On my last shopping trip I came up with the following:
Pep Sea, Mixed Nuts, Slim Jim, Reef Jerky, Ships Ahoy, Liquid Plumber and Coldwater Tide.
Don’t be afraid to experiment. Unlike the crazy names that parents pick for their kids now days, a boat name is easily changed.
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Bob E. Sherman is a boater based in Hallandale Beach. He is author of the book “Am I the Only One That Signals?”. He can be e-mailed at: signals@bobesherman.com .
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